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    New photos

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    I took this today, and LOVE it!!!
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    I've got an account over at SmugMug, where I store all my photos. It's an awesome site, and I love it. Our site is at I plan on setting up a subscription service, much like I do here, so that emails will automatically go out when I update photos. I'll be using FeedBurner to do so.

    In the meanwhile, until that's all set up, I'm throwing a few links up here to my updated/new galleries.

    2008-08-21 - Tyler's First Zoo Trip
    I was out of town, in Peoria, IL, for business. Sarah's friend, Mel, called Sarah to say that her and Ben (Mel's son) were going to the Fort Wayne Zoo. Of course, she invited Sarah and Tyler along, so they went. Tyler's first trip to the zoo, and I miss it *me shakes head* . It's ok though, I'll be there next time.

    2008-08-23 - 28th Street Metro Cruise
    Sarah's Dad, Mike, invited me to come with him to a car show/cruise up in Grand Rapids, MI. He owns a 1980 Fiat Spider, and Sarah's mom has a 1978 Fiat Spider (but she wasn't coming to the show). He wanted to bring both Fiats, so I drove one. The pictures were of all the Italian cars (read: Fiats) that gathered in front of an Italian Restaurant.
    New Pictures of Tyler
    Just pictures that we take here and then of our little prince. The link will take you to his August gallery, but it'll start you out on the first of the updated photos.
    Just some random pictures I've taken in August. Pictures of our new driveway, a grasshopper, etc. There's also a couple AWESOME pictures of Delilah (like the one displayed above, and this one). This link will start you on the first of the updated photos.
    All pictures uploaded today
    If you don't want to look at the pictures organized like they are above, and just want to see everything that I uploaded today.

    Alphabet Soup

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    What a cool friggin kid!
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    Or should I title this post as "Hooked on Phonics"?

    Tyler will be starting school soon. The context of "soon" should be read as "in about 4 and a half years". It amazes me, the things that go through a parent's mind, sometimes. I would like to propose and submit, to the educational body of our country, a "modified" alphabet. The English language and alphabet is too complicated in its current state. Here are the details of my proposal.

    The letter known as "C" shall be eliminated. The letters "K" and "S" shall fulfill its phonetic variants. For example, "cat" will become ""kat", "face" will become "fase", and "accent" will become (bekome) "aksent". The variant "ch" will be replaced with either "kh" or "jh". I suggest "jh" since it's close to the same sound, so "chalk" would become "jhalk".

    "G" will no longer hold the soft-g sound. "J" will be used instead. So, "giant" would become "jiant". "G" will retain the hard-g sound, so words like "get" or "gain" would not change.

    "Q" will be eliminated. Words like "quick" would become "kwik".

    "X" will be eliminated. Words like "exit" would become "eksit", and "xylophone" would become "zylophone" or "zylofone".

    The "PH" sound will be used by the letter "F", as in "phone becoming "fone".

    "GH" will no longer be used. "Laugh" will become "laf", and "high" would become "hie".

    Silent letters shall be eliminated. "Pneumonia" will become "neumonia", "ballet" would be "ballay", and "know" would be "noe".

    So, alltho there would be a learning kurve to the hole proposal from those uv us that grew up on the kurrent, arkiac system, give it a jhanse, and you'll kome to embrase it. If we make these jhanjes kwikly and effishently, we'll be mujh better off as a nayshun. I'm sure you will agree with my lojik, if you were to look at it objekshunably and fairly. This is an urjent matter, and I jenuinely appreshiate your time.

    Also, Brett Favre is an idiot. His last name should be pronounced either "Fahv-reh" or "Fahv-er". Pronouncing it as "Farv" makes no sense. Also, and this REALLY gets me, we need to come to a consensus on the proper way to pronounce "comfortable" (and "comfortably"). "Comfort" is sounded out as "kum-fort", yet "comfortable" is said as "kum-fter-bul" the "r" is before the "t" but we pronounce it the other way. That would be like "fort" being said as "fter". "Comfortable" should be "kum-fort-abl", or we should modify its spelling to "comfterble". I obsess about that every time I listen to Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb".

    We need to work on some numbers as well. 11 through 19 break the consistency of our system. 21 is "twenty-one". 45 is "forty-five". 11 should be "ten-one". 18 should be "ten-eight".

    Feel free to take most of this post with a grain of salt. Say to yourself, "That Joe, he's so craaaaazy", but I honestly do believe there are inconsistencies in our language that make no sense to me. Take the words "scene" and "scone". Why is the "c" silent in the first word, and a "kuh" sound in the second word? "High" and "laugh" come to mind as well. Silent and "f", respectively. Sure, we all learned it, our kids will learn all that, and our kids' kids will learn all that, but it's still confusing.

    And I do stand by my thoughts on numbering, "Favre", and "comfortable".

    Look who's blogging too

    My blogging agenda was interrupted tonight, but I have no complaints with that. Why, you ask? Well, because my wife decided she wanted her own blogspot/blogger account. Any time Sarah shows an interest in technology or the internet, I get very excited. I offered to just add her as an author to my account. Kinda like a "guest poster" or something. See, we don't really know how often she'll be blogging, and it seemed easier to do it that way.

    "But I want mine to be purple", she replied.


    So, I set up an account for her and spent the next few hours hacking away at the code to get it *just right*. The themes that come with blogspot/blogger are ok, I guess. And they do allow a certain level of easy color modifying. But there were some major code rewrites that I had to make in order to get it to how I liked it. Then, I had to add a bunch of variables so that Sarah can semi-easily go in and adjust the colors/borders, if she sees the need for it. She tends to like my choices, but it is her blog, afterall.

    I present to you... Sarah's blog, "Because I Said So". I've also added it to my "Required Reading" on the right hand pane, under the most recent photos. Look to the right, and scroll around if you don't see it.

    Check it out... she's not as awesome as I am, but she's gosh-darned close ;)

    Stunts, lies, and rolls

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    Vacation Photos
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    We spent this past weekend at Mel and Ad's cottage. It's about a block from a lake. The basic agenda was to sit around, play at the beach, go out on the boat, go tubing and go skiing. We stuck pretty well to that plan.

    I rarely get in the water. This is due to an unnatural fear of water/swimming that I have. When I was much younger (I dunno, 6 years old maybe), my dad decided he was going to teach me how to swim. We were at a beach. He was supporting my body by having both of his hands under the water with me lying on top of them. I was extremely nervous at the time. I remember, very clearly, telling him to not let go. He said, and I quote, "I won't let go."

    He let go.

    No warning, no easing his hands away. Suddenly, the support was gone, and I was going under. As a very young, impressionable, child, I quickly fell into a blood-chilling panic.

    For about the next 18 years, I wouldn't go into water any deeper than my waist. I worked up the courage to go to my neck.

    3 years ago, we were hanging with Mel and Ad on their boat. Of course, the pressure was on me (again) to get into the water. I somehow found the strength to put on a life jacket and go to the edge of the boat. Adam tells me to just step off. The then GUARANTEES me that my head would not go under the water. After another 3 or 5 minutes of worrying and just standing there... I step off...

    And go under the water. @$$%*&#

    That quickly led to me going tubing and having a BLAST. This year, I actually got up on skis and did pretty well. I wouldn't dare get in the water (if it's over my head) without a life jacket, but I'm making progress. I also went tubing while facing backwards on the tube (Adam's idea) and it was a friggin' riot!

    I don't want Tyler to think his daddy's a wuss-monger or anything, so I may have adjusted the truth a little bit. I scooped him up in my arms and told him about my death-defying stunts. I told him about the flips I was doing, and about catching about 15 foot of air on a jump. I felt a tinge of guilt as I told him my modified story. I'll have to make sure to delete this post when he learns to read.

    Now for a totally unrelated topic. Today finds me in Peoria, Illinois, sitting in a Holiday Inn hotel room. I was asked to come out so that I can demonstrate some stuff for bunch of people tomorrow... blah blah blah, work stuff. It was about 6 hours of driving. Fun times. Well, yesterday, I picked up a new GPS. I got the Garmin nuvi 205. Aside from telling me how to get from point A to point B, it also can store photos and display a slideshow. FINALLY, I can look at pics while I'm driving all over the place.

    Well, while I was driving on the toll road, I turned on the slideshow to check it out. Up comes a picture of Tyler on the day he was born (7 weeks ago). He was born at 10 pounds 2 ounces, which is pretty frickin big. Looking at the picture, though, I couldn't help but think of how SMALL he looked. He looks tiny, even though he looked gigantor at the time.

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    I certainly don't remember him growing, but he seems to have done it anyway. I don't think I'm a fan of this. It's happening way too fast. The boy weighs 15 pounds now, and isn't even 2 months old. Our dreams of him becoming a University of Michigan kicker, then an NFL kicker are turning into dreams of him becoming a UofM linebacker, then an NFL linebacker. I'm sure he'll eventually grow into all his extra rolls and extra necks and extra chins though... right?

    Look at him... he's got moobs (sometimes lovingly referred to as man-boobs, or chesticles)

    Do you know who I am?

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    I love his eyes
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    Last Wednesday, I had to drive up to Kalamazoo, Michigan. There was some training taking place Thursday morning that I needed, so I got a hotel. I kissed Tyler goodbye and begged him to be good to his mom, because she needed some good sleep. The previous night, he was up every 60 to 90 minutes. He'd take one boob and fall back asleep. I told Sarah to put him in HIS room (he's been sleeping in a crib in our room), shut HIS door, shut OUR bedroom door, and set the alarm for two and a half hours, and go to sleep.

    What's that, you say? Just wake him up and give him Boob B? Get it, boob b? Boobie, hahaha. Thank you for that one, Adam. Let me be very clear here when I say that when Tyler falls asleep at the boob, the boy goes COMATOSE. Sarah calls it a milk coma, and she is very right in calling it so. Waking him up is simply not an option.

    With that being said, one of the fundamental differences between Sarah and I, and, I assume, most moms and dads, lies in how crying affects us. I may have blogged about this before, so forgive me (and feel free to skim the rest of this paragraph) if this sounds familiar. When I've got Ty, and he starts crying, I go through a mental checklist. If he's clean, dry, fed, and burped, I tell him he's going to have to just cry it out. I'm certainly not that brash, but you see my point (hopefully). With Sarah, logic takes a backseat to emotion. And let me just say that emotion shouldn't have a driver's license. When Sarah hears Tyler cry, she says that it makes her heart hurt.

    Now, don't get me wrong, I understand where she's coming from, just as she understands where I'm coming from. But it's like a Catholic telling a Baptist that the Baptist's beliefs are crazy. The Baptist is just going to yell back at the Catholic, "NO U!!"

    I'm sure you've all been in a situation where you and your mate were at odds with each other. Try to put yourself back in that situation for a moment. Are you there yet? Ok. Now, imagine my surprise the next morning, when I talk to Sarah and she tells me that she took my advice.

    Allow me to say that again.

    *clears throat*

    The next morning, I was talking to Sarah from my hotel room. She told me that she took my advice. A woman took a man's advice. A woman took a man's advice. A woman. A woman. A woman. A woman took a man's advice.

    She put Tyler in his crib, shut the door, went into our bedroom, shut the door, set her alarm for 2 hours, and fell asleep. As a testament to how tired she was, at some point she turned her alarm off and woke up 3 hours later. IN A PANIC! Tyler was fine though. He had apparently awakened just a couple minutes earlier. When Sarah went to check on him, he was wide-eyed and ready for food.

    He took both boobs.

    Now that the foghorns, train whistles, and braying alarm sirens have died down, I must say again that Sarah took my advice.

    MY thought is that she took my advice because I'm pretty stinkin' smart and it was a good idea. Sarah would say it was because she was exhausted and not in her right mind at the time. In short, she'd plead temporary insanity.


    Looking back over this post, I've gotta tell ya, my intention today was to blog about something entirely different. I, more or less, start typing and just let my fingers take me where they must. It is as if I am Gan's facilitator (Stephen King reference. Don't worry if you don't get it). Either way, I now must decide whether to make this one long blog, or turn it into a two-parter. Hrm.... let's keep going... one long post.

    I was in Kalamazoo on Thursday for some training. Sarah had a dentist appointment that morning. Tyler did great while she was in there getting her teeth cleaned. Afterward, she took Logan to the kennel and went home. She loaded up the car with luggage and supplies, Delilah, and Tyler, then hit the road to Kalamazoo. We were invited to hang out with our friends (Mel and Adam) at their cottage by the lake, for the weekend. I met Sarah around 4 or 5p at Mel and Ad's new house. We got the tour and hung out there for a couple hours. While their house was very nice, and while I was very impressed, nothing - NOTHING - could top what happened very shortly after the tour. No, it wasn't the fact that I fixed their doorbell (which I believe they don't even know about). And it wasn't even that either Luci (their lab/hound pup) or Delilah made a mess on their new carpet. This is, after all, a daddy-blog, right? "Off-Topic Tuesday" does have a nice ring to it, though. It's my idea and you can't have it!

    What I am taking forever to get at is this: Tyler smiled at me last Thursday. And it wasn't one of those ehh-it-could-be-gas smiles. It was, without a doubt, a "Hey, there's my daddy!" smile. A gummy, mouth wide open smile. He does this every time I see him now. Needless to say, I was on cloud nine. It is easily the highlite of my day now, getting to see my son smile AT ME! Much like Joanna, he puts his smiling face away as soon as the camera points at him. I was pretty quick on the trigger a couple times and managed to capture a few half-smiles before he put on his professor-face.

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    I caught a smile
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    So, there I am, full to the brim and overflowing with glee, when Sarah strolls into the room.

    "Sarah! Tyler smiled at me when he saw me! A genuine, legitimate smile!"

    Sarah, not to be outdone, grabbed my bucket o' glee and tossed it out the patio door with this gem:

    "Yeah, he's been doing that with me for about a week."

    Sarah, if you're reading this, you can stop now. The rest of this post is nothing but highly-technical computer talk.

    The array variable wasn't populated properly. Storing a floating point number in a boolean field will result in a false...

    Is she gone?

    After mentally shooting daggers at her, I said, with my don't-you-dare-say-it-out-loud (also known as the for-the-love-of-god-don't-let-this-get-past-your-lips) voice, "Yeah, well he smiles bigger for me."

    So, in conclusion, Scriptaculous uses prototyped arrays, and the for/each statement doesn't work as intended any longer.

    This feels strange

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    Tyler with his Aunt JiJi during "Girl's Week" at Aunt Karla's
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    Sarah and I went on a date yesterday! I have been eagerly awaiting the arrival of Batman: The Dark Knight. Unfortunately, I don't do very well around large crowds, so I rarely watch movies on opening weekend. I was also told by an online "friend" that if you ever see a movie in IMAX, this would be that movie. There is an IMAX theatre in Lansing, Michigan, which is about a 2 hour drive from our house. It also just-so-happens that we have to drive past Sarah's families' houses to get there. Jillian jumped at the chance to watch Tyler.

    Sarah was all for a special movie experience. Sarah's dad (Mike) also wanted to go, along with one of Sarah's other sisters (Allison), and her boyfriend (Darren). We had no problem with this. The more the merrier.

    At movie theatres, popular movies will show either 30 minutes or an hour apart, because they play the movie on 2 or more screens. With IMAX, there's only one screen, so the movie plays every 3 hours. This limited when we could go. 12:30p, 3:30p, 6:30p, 9:30p.  I couldn't arrange the 12:30 or 3:30 because I work during the week, and it was always the plan to go on a weekday (not as busy). The 9:30, was too late. The movie wouldn't get out until 12:15a, so we wouldn't get home until after 2am, and I would have to work the next day. This left 6:30p.

    Well, Mike doesn't get home from work until 6pm, and it's still about 90 minutes to the theatre, so he had to cancel. I debated with myself on maybe ditching the IMAX plan and going to the regular theatre there in town so there would be more time selections. When it came down to it, I was way too excited for IMAX to settle for anything less. Darren was still in, but Allison had to work. Darren had to end up bailing as well. This left just Sarah and myself.

    While I would have loved to have them all there, I had no problem at all with it just being the two of us. We left our house around 3:30pm and got to Jillian's (Aunt JiJi) house at 4:15p. We hung out there for about 15 minutes or so before hitting the road up to Lansing.

    I work 5 days a week. For me, walking out of the house and saying goodbye to Tyler has become something of a habit. I miss them both very much, but, in a sense, I'm used to it. I hope this makes sense. I'm sure it does to all my readers that are in a similar situation.

    Sarah, on the other hand, has not done this. She did go out recently to a Dave Matthews concert, and left Tyler in my care. Maybe it's a "mom thing", I dunno. As we were pulling out of Jillian's driveway Sarah immediately mentioned that it was strange leaving Tyler.

    Even stranger to us was the fact that, due to the circumstances, Sarah on I were on a date. This is the first time we've been alone since Tyler was born. Previous to Tyler, we had a "thing" where we had a date night every Friday. Failing that, Saturday. That came to a screeching halt with the arrival of Tyler. Being out alone together made things everything much, much nicer.

    We even had dinner before the movie. Dinner being a burger from Wendy's that we ate in the theatre parking lot.

    I'm not going to do a movie review here. Personally, I don't think I'm that great of a writer. In my mind, nothing that I say will do justice to the masterpiece that I was given the honor of viewing last evening. Really, the movie was great. IMAX... just... wow. There was a warning before the movie started that it could make you nauseous, and that if you felt nauseous, you should close your eyes for a couple moments until the feeling went away. I balked at the message. Good luck getting me to even BLINK for the next 2 hours. The only time I looked away from the screen was when I asked Sarah to grab me a box of Hot Tamales that she smuggled in the theatre in her purse. $0.97 at Walmart, or $3.75 at the theatre.... you'd do the same.

    We picked Tyler up at 10:30. He was an angel for his Aunt JiJi and Cousin Lexi. He even got a bath over there.

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    The Bat Pod... can it be done?
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    I've now got the task of quickly teaching Tyler how to use AutoCAD and how to turn a wrench. We are immediately going to work on converting my Ninja motorcycle into the Bat Pod. Sarah requested that I not load the guns with live ammo right away.

    Dobra Kayfoundo

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    Chowbasa (Welcome)
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    Allow me to translate. Dobra Kayfoundo is Huttese for "I am hungry". Huttese... as in Jabba the Hutt. Look it up, you'll see that I'm right.

    Sometimes, when Tyler is hungry, he'll lick his lips. When he does that, Sarah says he looks like Jabba the Hutt.

    My wife knows who Jabba the Hutt is!

    Night terrors

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    He has no idea why I keep putting a flashing box (camera) in his face.
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    Tyler likes to learn new tricks. Last night, at around 2am, Tyler woke up, screaming bloody murder. It was a scream that Sarah and I have never heard, and it scared the ever-living crap out of us. Sarah was out of bed and on her feet before my eyes were completely open. I honestly have no idea how she can move so fast.

    Within 2 seconds of being scooped up, he was silent again, heading back towards sleep. I mumbled something - to myself - about waking me up for nothing, and also started heading back towards sleep. I assume that Sarah did the same.

    Then, at 5:55am, Tyler woke up, screaming bloody murder.

    I don't like having to admit this, but Sarah and I have grown accustomed to Tyler's cries. Sarah, more so than me. We can differentiate between hungry-cries, diaper-cries, and gassy-cries. My displeasure in admitting that is due to the fact that I used to consider it a bunch of hogwash. I've heard babies cry and scream before, mostly at Wal-Mart, and they've ALL sounded identical to me: annoying. I used to mumble, (again) to myself, "shut that baby up". I know I'm not the only person who's ever had that thought, although I may be one of the very few to admit it. Now that I'm a parent, and have had some first-hand experience, I would like to use this blog to offer a public apology to anyone who has been in the care of a crying baby while in public. Truly, I am sorry.

    This new scream, coming in the darkest of the night, stopped our hearts, cold. It was very reassuring that he calmed immediately after being held.

    The fact that he was awake, and that he calmed down, steers me away from thinking they were night terrors. However, I could easily believe they were nightMARES. Google seems to agree.

    But then it begs the question... What the heck can a 41-day-old baby be having nightmares about? He doesn't know who Frankenstein's monster is (who just so happens to have been the subject of my childhood recurring nightmares). He has no knowledge of Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees, Mike Myers, or Bubba Sawyer (a.k.a. Leatherface ).

    Racking my brain, I've come up with two possible sources of this nightmare. The first is "tummy-time". He does not like, at all, being on his belly for more than a few minutes. As a matter of fact, I believe Tyler is going to skip crawling, and go directly to walking. He absolutely LOVES standing up - with me supporting him, of course. When we do this, the expression on his face reads, "zOMG, I don't know what this is, but I want more of it!!!!" I'll have Sarah help me get a picture of it. It's awesome.

    My other thought is that he was reliving the experience of his mother nearly dropping him. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BURRRRNNNNNNN!!!!!!

    I'm going to pay for that comment later.

    Sarah dropped the baby!!!

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    I think this is one of the cutest pictures of Tyler, to date.
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    Well, not really, but that certainly got your attention, didn't it. I know I'm going to catch hell when she sees that I've blogged about it, though.

    Here's the scenario. I was sitting on the couch at the foot end, playing on my laptop. I'm sure I was likely checking out the latest headlines on Digg or catching up on celebrity gossip at WWTDD (yes, I'm a sucker for that stuff). More than likely, I was reading all the blogs I've got bookmarked. I've found that to be a much better way to spend my time than just blankly look at google's homepage, wondering what topic to search for next.

    Sarah was lying on the couch, across 2 of the 3 cushions. I was sitting on the last. Tyler was lying on Sarah's chest. The two of them were napping sleeping. Seemingly out of nowhere, Tyler decides he wants to reposition himself. He kinda just shifted his head off to one side, but he's got a big, heavy head. The weight of his head, and his lack of toned core muscles caused his entire body to roll off of Sarah's chest.

    I think Sarah reacted first, but it was only by a single micro-second. Sarah swung over and snatched him before he had any real chance of falling completely off. All I could muster was a complete body-jerk reaction and an involuntary spewing of a colorful phrase that would be a synonym to "HOLY CRAP!"

    I said that phrase 2 or 3 more times afterward. Sarah's eyes were about bugged out of her head. And our little Tyler, well he slept through the entire thing.

    I knew, at that moment, what I would be blogging about today. I don't think Sarah will end my life right away though. She was gone all last week, and has fallen behind on reading my blog. She probably won't read this until next week, and will, hopefully have a sense of humor about it.

    If this blog isn't updated within the next 3 or 4 days, please call the authorities.


    Well... it takes a little bit of time to see how Blogger structures their code, but I think I've got a grasp on it. I've been playing with design, colors, and borders for the last hour or so here. Getting the right areas boxed in the way I wanted took a few minutes, but it was worth it. As you can see, I like bland and basic, but I'm very picky at how it all fits together. I'm diggin' it now, man!

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    Sarah and I on our honeymoon
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    Did you know

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    The shirtless wonder
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    Sarah and I were taking Tyler for a walk last week. We were walking down 7th Street, which is the main drag of our quaint little town. To our left, we could see the water tower.

    Before I continue, sorry the ADHD is taking hold, I have to say this. They (they being an unknown entity) painted the water tower recently. I noticed that they put on a primer coat of gray paint. That seemed to take a couple weeks. I remember, one day, they had some type of cloth cover over the whole thing. Well, I was driving home a few days ago and, ALL OF A SUDDEN, I see that the entire thing had gotten it's final coat. How the heck did they do that so quickly? There isn't any lettering on the top of the tower yet, and I really don't know if they will put anything there. I wouldn't be surprised to see something up there that mentions the ACD Museum. Maybe "Auburn, it's a Deusey! nyuk nyuk nyuk"

    Anyway, we're going for a walk and I look at the water tower. That's when it dawned on me that I have to teach Tyler EVERYTHING I know. He's going to ask me what the stars are, how door locks work, how to tie a knot, how to drive, how plants grow... everything. I got scared.

    Tyler was awake at the time, so I started talking. I figured I better start now, because I've got a lot of stuff to go over with him over the next 80 years or so.
    "Tyler, that's a water tower. There's about a million gallons of water in there. See, big pumps push the water up into the tower. Gravity tries pulling the water back down some other pipes in the tower. This creates water pressure. Those pipes go everywhere, including to our house. When we turn a faucet on, the force of gravity pushing on the water in the tower pushes it through all the pipes and out the faucet."
    Tyler didn't seem to care. I may have to explain that to him again in a few years. I did get a reaction from Sarah though. She said, "Wow, I didn't even know that".

    Of course, my ego shot up a hundred-fold, so I followed up with, "Yeah, that's why we can still get water when the power goes out. There's usually a full day's worth up there."

    The problem is, there's a lot... a LOT... that I don't know. Tyler won't ask me easy stuff, like "how do you tie a shoe?" or "where is the ground?". He's going to ask stuff I have no knowledge of. I don't mind saying "I don't know" a few times, but I'm scared that I may be saying it over and over again to some of his questions. I'm going to have to make a list of the things he asks me, get on google when he goes to bed, and get some answers for him for the next day.

    I could always just take the easy way out and say "it's magic" to all his questions. I think I could get away with that for a while, right?

    "Dad, how do they get the people inside the TV?"

    "It's magic, son. Magic."

    "How do cars work, daddy?"

    "That's magic also, boy."

    "Where to babies come from?"

    "From dark magic, Tyler. Voodoo stuff."